She's just not that into you, so what's the point?

RANT, RANT, RANT…
 
I have figured out a long time ago that, it is not a crime to get to know friends. And it is also not a crime to try to develop upon one’s relationship with friends of the opposite gender. Who knows? Maybe there’s someone who similarly likes you, and something amazing could progress from there. Personally, I believe that with whatever effort you put into such an endeavour, you will get your due and just returns. But, from my observation of my friends, as well as from my own personal experience, it does appear that many girls perceive that any attempt by guys to get to know them better, even as a normal friend, is some sort of unforgivable crime, and some believe in it with a vengeance. And sometimes I even ask myself, why do I even try so hard, if I am just going to scare her away, and we wouldn’t even be able to talk to each other anymore.
 
Let’s just take for example the innocent actions of a typical guy who wishes to make a good impression of himself in the eyes of his female acquintances. He may dress smartly, stand up straight, groom himself properly. He may also talk with confidence, and act like a gentlemen, display courtesy and generous behaviour. All these in the hopes of getting off to a good start. Strangely enough, some girls may become annoyed at this guy who is acting all-so-proud and so full of himself, suspicion may even grow as to the motives of this guy’s kindness towards them. Usually by this point, the girls would already be giving the guy the cold shoulder, leaving me to wonder what have I done wrong this time round?
 
Perhaps a more common theme that has been floating around almost forever is the idea that girls would prefer guys that are confident of themselves and take the initiative, instead of some spineless, cowardly loser who cannot make the simplest decisions. So I take the initiative, start a conversation with girls, invite them out for dinnner or movie. Rather than feeling flattered at having received such attention from guys, some girls would become seriously offended by this upstart who thinks that he even has the right to talk or socialise with them, and henceforth they would literally shut me out of their lives. They don’t seem to realise that for guys to even try to approach them required enormous courage and nerves of steel. And to get such an outcome is, simply put, devastating. Not only is a possible friendship totally destroyed before it could begin, it’s not even recoverable.
 
It seems that in my above examples, the girls in question belong to a category that regard themselves as having no necessity or desire to know any guy friends, either because they think that they already have a satisfactory pool of friends (usually all female ones), or they are simply hostile towards guys for no tangible reason. In my personal opinion, this kind of behaviour cannot be normal, especially when if she is not interested, at least we can still be friends, but instead she treats me like a fool and avoid me like the black death. This only goes to show a lack of maturity on the girls’ part with regards to making friends. I thought we humans are all a social people, needing interaction and association with each other to live our lives meaningfully. 
 
And almost every time I try to befriend someone better, it always seems like some sort of disaster in the making, such that I have to be very careful in what I say or do, so I could at least stay on talking terms with her. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. And still, I keep on trying, not because I like to fail all the time, but I believe that somewhere out there there is the special one for me. Nothing is ever achieved through zero action. And trying is not a crime, the crime is in not trying. To give up without knowing what it could have been, what can be even greater sin than that?
 
And with each experience I come away having learnt what had I done wrong, and hopefully know what mistakes to avoid when I make friends in the future. Life goes on, and what that does not kills me makes me stronger and wiser. I have decided not to feel too bad if the girls I try to associate with have no interest in me, from my perspective they are only losing out a great opportunity to know me as an ally and a friend. Frankly speaking, if a girl is unable to even continue as a normal friend with some guy who tried to be nice to her, it is her serious problem. Not mine.
  
P.S. Can anybody guess which movie did I derive my blog title from? I don’t believe it, never see it happening.
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: